Role
Hilarity Ensues
Added Fri Nov 19 02:34:54 2010 at level 18:
Twinkling stars peered down from the heavens through a break in the clouds,
watching the drama unfold on a lone ship on the vast, open sea.
A high elf shivered behind a barrel on the deck, his eyes bloodshot and face
pale. A human wept in the fetal position in the hold. A dwarf sputtered out
curses, tears and snot.
Dismembered bodies covered the blood-soaked deck. The captains cabin was on
fire. The ship was going to sink.
A young wood-elf covered in tattoos looked on at the aftermath of his prank.
He was no longer laughing.
* * *
Poerlouge lived his entire youth in Evermoon Hollow. His mother died and his
father ran off into the wilds, mad with grief. A particularly charitable
(though aloof) high-elven adviser to the wood-elven royalty adopted him and
opted to live full-time in Evermoon.
Because of this, Poerlouge was as much of a city-slicker as a wood-elf could
be. Every time he sat down for a meal in the tavern or slept in a bed - which
was every night - his wild blood burned and he wasnt sure why.
His energy turned inward, fueling his imagination. He wasnt allowed to play
outside for days on end - he instead was confined to the citys halls,
finding true freedom only in books and make-believe.
While others his age were out in the woods, sowing their wild oats, he turned
to plotting outrageous pranks. He tied the weaponsmiths shoelaces together.
He convinced a socialite at the tavern that she was suffering a terrible
malady and the only cure was standing on her head for a full hour. She passed
out after ten minutes.
He began telling wild, nonsensical tales and spreading conspiracy theories
about real people. Obviously, it wasnt long before he became widely
disliked, and his adopted parents pulled some strings to get him a job on a
ship. It would teach him some discipline.
* * *
The dwarven captains face was as wrinkled and brown as a rotten grape.
Swab the deck, ye skinny idiot!
The dwarf spat.
Ye did a shit job last time, didnt ye? Thats why yer doin a double night
watch shift tonight.
Poerlouge smirked and silently obeyed.
Later that night, he paced the deck alone, his mind drifting as he fought
sleep. This situation, he concluded, could only be salvaged by a prank.
It would be eight more days before they reached the next port. Ample time for
a good one. The captain, ironically, was deathly afraid of the water and
always stayed several paces away from the side of the ship. Now, imagine the
terror he would feel if he was even more afraid of the ship than he was of
the water.
Hilarious!
The Merry Prankster
Added Wed Nov 24 18:31:50 2010 at level 40:
The first alleged supernatural experience occurred shortly after a storm had
already frightened and sickened many of the crew members.
A womans sorrowful voice was heard below deck, singing a song about how and
why she murdered her children. When a brave crew member finally went to
investigate, he found a small portrait of a beautiful woman near where the
voice had apparently originated.
He turned the old, framed portrait over in his hands, as though he were
looking for some kind of rational explanation.
He jumped as the voice began moaning again.
'If you cause me harm, your children will be neeeeeeeexxxxxttt!!!!!!!!!'
The crew member dropped the picture and scrambled back up the stairs to find
comfort in the arms of his gasping shipmates.
Poerlouge, a master of the art of throwing his voice, kept hidden nearby and
stifled his mad giggles.
The next evening, he wrote a poem using a red dye he crafted from
foul-smelling dried berries he had brought from home and sea water.
That night, a crew member on night patrol found the ghastly message written
in a red, morbidly drippy script - a horrifying sight when viewed by lantern
light:
WeSsLiN wAs SiX
aNd In HiS cOfFiN hE kIcKs
ViScToN wAs NiNe
LeFt CrYiNg In A mInE
i Am HeRe To WaTcH yOu SlEeP
dOnT yOu DaRe MaKe A pEeP!
For good measure, Poerlouge had sprinkled some of the blood-like ink on some
of his sleeping crewmates. They woke up the next morning unsettled. Their
feelings turned to horror when they saw the message.
For a couple more days, the prank became more intense (and hilarious to
Poerlouge). But one night, Poerlouge lost control of the situation.
The crew members began blaming one another for bringing the curse on the
ship. The captain was just as irrational. Finally, one sailor accused the
captain and demanded that he seize command of his ship.
'Walk the plank, ye scurvy dog!' the dwarven captain screamed at the lanky,
half-drow mutineer. 'SEIZE HIM!'
Almost immediately, swords clashed and blood stained the wooden deck.
Poerlouge took cover and watched. It wasnt funny anymore.
Freedom!?
Added Wed Nov 24 18:32:48 2010 at level 40:
By the end of the battle, only a few crew members (including Poerlouge) and the
captain remained alive. And as night approached, they all went mad with fear.
They wept and they hid from one another, paralyzed with fright.
They all soon became convinced that the ghosts of the dead sailors were
haunting them - even Poerlouge believed it this time. Soon, another storm
hit, and every creak and movement of the old ship had Poerlouge convinced he
was going to be dragged to Hell.
The diminished crew couldnt properly control the ship, and eventually
drifted off-course, onto the treacherous waters of the Western Aryth.
Thats when the Sea Dragon struck.
Poerlouge remembered little of the attack aside from splintering wood and the
dwarfs gurgling screams.
He woke up, hours or perhaps days later, in a bay near a large, grassy meadow
rimmed by dense forest, traumatized, depressed, paranoid and left with an
extremely warped sense of humor.
The young prankster who had denied the urges in his blood for so many decades
was, at last, free.
In some ways, at least.
Going to Change the World
Added Wed Nov 24 18:34:50 2010 at level 40:
The dark forest filled Poerlouge with dread.
In the shadows, hed pick out shapes that may have been the ghosts and
revenants of the sailors who died as a result of his prank.
But his wood-elven instincts began to come alive. He found himself a far more
effective hunter and scavenger than he would have otherwise imagined. His
high-elven foster parents never would have imagined him capable of this this.
Or would they have? Did they willingly suppress his natural urges for some
black-hearted purpose? Are they infiltrating wood-elven society for the
Spire?
Poerlouge didnt know for certain, but he was determined to ask the
questions.
In the meantime, he set up tripwires along heavily trafficked forest roads
and started writing nonsensical propaganda again to distribute near Seantryn
Modan. But greater adventures soon called.
Someone who must have heard him singing in the wilds stopped to take notice
of his voice.
It was a young human.
'Would you care to travel?' the human asked, offering a no-strings-attached
guided trip to the other side of Thera.
'Why not?' Poerlouge responded. 'Lets go change the world!'
Thar-Eris?
Added Wed Nov 24 20:26:40 2010 at level 40:
Poerlouge somewhat organically fell in with the Outlanders of Thar-Eris after
meeting with several wood-folk who urged him to speak with Balta, the
Harbinger of Thar-Eris.
Balta at first seemed annoyed by Poerlouges wild conspiracy theories, but
eventually succumbed to his charms after witnessing him prank a 'customer'
who asked him to pen a scroll to all of Thera asking for funds to help
rebuild Arial City.
Little does Balta know that Poerlouge, while certainly a bit mad, is
certainly not all mad. Poerlouge sees his entire existence as one large prank
and, truly, wants to see what happens when the world unravels.
He doesnt expect or desire bloodshed or fame. He expects and desires only a
reaction, whatever that may be. And Baltas incessant preaching about the
mysterious Ancient known as the Imp Lyristeon has drawn Poerlouges interest.
The wilder-bard now seeks the gods attention.
PK Wins
Dec 1, 2010 |Lv 51|Keep of the Righteous|Arkellin vs 4: Poerlouge (17%), Onya (0%), Salahrucid (82%, KB), Knievo (0%)
Dec 2, 2010 |Lv 51|Aran'gird|Kharten vs 3: Poerlouge (34%,KB), Silona (40%), Irmalsta (25%)
Dec 4, 2010 |Lv 51|The Aryth Ocean|Smilosh vs 3: Targrala (76%,KB), Poerlouge (0%), Gvantulak (23%)
Dec 5, 2010 |Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Chenaz vs 4: Poerlouge (0%), Tulesini (55%, KB), Balta (16%), Irmalsta (27%)
Dec 6, 2010 |Lv 51|Galadon|Groggrom vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 6, 2010 |Lv 51|Galadon|Groggrom vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 7, 2010 |Lv 51|Forest of Prosimy|Zasowski vs 3: Onya (46%), Poerlouge (5%), Silona (47%, KB)
Dec 8, 2010 |Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Puwtoc vs 2: Onya (72%,KB), Poerlouge (27%)
Dec 8, 2010 |Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Puwtoc vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 8, 2010 |Lv 51|Hamsah Mu'tazz|Puwtoc vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 8, 2010 |Lv 51|Mount Calandaryl|Sekryelenius vs 2: Tulesini (28%,KB), Poerlouge (71%)
Dec 9, 2010 |Lv 51|Galadon|Zacchaeus vs 2: Poerlouge (44%,KB), Floople (55%)
Dec 9, 2010 |Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Groggrom vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 10, 2010|Lv 51|Desert of Araile|Zanneel vs 3: Salahrucid (58%), Poerlouge (33%, KB), Kharten (7%)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|The Dragon Sea|Zanneel vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|Mount Kiadana-Rah|Anmessht vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|The Outlander Refuge|Zanneel vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|Arkham|Groggrom vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|Voralian City|Dridwindal vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|Hamsah Mu'tazz|Anmessht vs 2: Poerlouge (5%,KB), Sirol (94%)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Truhukk vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 11, 2010|Lv 51|Forest of Prosimy|Anmessht vs 1: Poerlouge (100%,KB)
Dec 12, 2010|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Lam vs 2: Pago (55%), Poerlouge (44%, acidic bite)
Dec 12, 2010|Lv 51|Organia, the Veil of Shadow|Bhoryuk vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, mental assault)
Dec 13, 2010|Lv 51|Kuo-Toa Lair|Anmessht vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, mental assault)
Dec 14, 2010|Lv 51|The Seaport of Hamsah Mu'tazz|Farrouk vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, acidic bite)
Dec 14, 2010|Lv 51|The Outlander Refuge|Zanneel vs 2: Silona (50%), Poerlouge (49%, bite)
Dec 14, 2010|Lv 51|The Imperial Palace|Pandol vs 2: Semirha (43%), Poerlouge (56%, mental assault)
Dec 15, 2010|Lv 51|The Tahril Mountains|Anmessht vs 2: Poerlouge (10%), Silona (89%, bite)
Dec 15, 2010|Lv 51|The Outlander Refuge|Anmessht vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, KB)
Dec 22, 2010|Lv 51|Silverwood|Lam vs 3: Balta (35%, thorns), Semirha (54%), Poerlouge (10%)
Dec 22, 2010|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Lam vs 2: Balta (17%, thorns), Poerlouge (82%)
Jan 4, 2011 |Lv 51|Khalid River|Hralpelk vs 2: Lam (53%), Poerlouge (46%, acidic bite)
Jan 10, 2011|Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Kasslo vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, mental assault)
Jan 10, 2011|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Pandol vs 2: Poerlouge (0%), Doban (100%, pummeling blow)
Jan 10, 2011|Lv 51|Seantryn Modan|Kasslo vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, mental assault)
Jan 12, 2011|Lv 51|Forest of Prosimy|Hralpelk vs 2: Poerlouge (80%), Grigor (19%, dispel evil)
Jan 12, 2011|Lv 51|Forest of Prosimy|Dishapo vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, KB)
Jan 12, 2011|Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Lamoran vs 2: Poerlouge (76%, reverberating blast), Silona (23%)
Feb 4, 2011 |Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Ghrimriddor vs 3: Mundin (26%), Poerlouge (29%, KB), Sherys (43%)
Feb 5, 2011 |Lv 51|Galadon|Umrid vs 2: Poerlouge (43%), Grigor (56%, torments)
Feb 7, 2011 |Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Thrawk vs 5: Serelyia (8%), Onya (17%), Jehsonay (18%), Poerlouge (45%, KB), Sherys (8%)
Feb 7, 2011 |Lv 51|South Sutherspring Road|Elajac vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, shocking grasp)
Feb 8, 2011 |Lv 51|The Imperial Lands|Verren vs 3: Poerlouge (3%), Zasowski (19%), Jerrokrar (76%, drowning)
Feb 10, 2011|Lv 51|The Imperial Lands|Pandol vs 5: Danaul (11%), Thwrerrorip (12%, searing light), Athioles (28%), Zasowski (1%), Poerlouge (45%)
Feb 14, 2011|Lv 51|Galadon|Jerrokrar vs 4: Drayden (10%), Kai (48%, claw), Poerlouge (0%), Athioles (40%)
Feb 15, 2011|Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Cinalas vs 2: Serelyia (0%), Poerlouge (100%, KB)
Feb 15, 2011|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Derialx vs 2: Pago (19%), Poerlouge (80%, acidic bite)
Feb 16, 2011|Lv 51|Galadon|Tuttie vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, reverberating blast)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|Bramblefield Road|Verren vs 2: Poerlouge (94%, KB), Mharlndarn (5%)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|The Jade Mountains|Hajoboboq vs 2: Ghrimriddor (4%), Poerlouge (95%, mental assault)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|Galadon|Derialx vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, bite)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|Silverwood|Umrid vs 4: Athioles (37%, drumming maces), Ghrimriddor (11%), Serelyia (10%), Poerlouge (39%)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|Silverwood|Ghrimriddor vs 4: Poerlouge (55%, KB), Hajoboboq (25%), Derialx (0%), Umrid (18%)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|Silverwood|Derialx vs 2: Ghrimriddor (16%), Poerlouge (83%, KB)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Pyogyor vs 2: Poerlouge (85%, mental assault), Faeshu (14%)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|Outskirts of Galadon|Derialx vs 2: Varitzoth (27%, onslaught of water), Poerlouge (72%)
Feb 21, 2011|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Flaaayin vs 2: Varitzoth (2%), Poerlouge (97%, mental assault)
Feb 23, 2011|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Throm vs 3: Serelyia (14%), Athioles (47%, crush), Poerlouge (38%)
Feb 24, 2011|Lv 51|The Eastern Road|Ghrimriddor vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, acidic bite)
Feb 24, 2011|Lv 51|Forest of Prosimy|Tuttie vs 2: Nathuel (43%), Poerlouge (56%, mental assault)
Feb 25, 2011|Lv 51|Spiderhaunt Woods|Ghrimriddor vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, acidic bite)
Feb 27, 2011|Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Derialx vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, KB)
Feb 27, 2011|Lv 51|Northern Foothills|Mahr vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, mental assault)
Feb 28, 2011|Lv 51|Galadon|Brom vs 2: Pago (30%, thrust), Poerlouge (69%)
Mar 1, 2011 |Lv 51|The Ruins of Ostalagiah|Hyu vs 1: Poerlouge (100%, acidic bite)
Mar 2, 2011 |Lv 51|Galadon|Derialx vs 3: Poerlouge (25%, reverberating blast), Balta (58%), Karkarrak (16%)
Mar 2, 2011 |Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Mundin vs 3: Balta (16%), Poerlouge (33%, reverberating blast), Karkarrak (49%)
Mar 2, 2011 |Lv 51|The Spire of the Blood Tribunal|Derialx vs 3: Poerlouge (38%, reverberating blast), Balta (17%), Karkarrak (44%)
Mar 3, 2011 |Lv 51|Fortress of Light|Errsoca vs 3: Poerlouge (21%, acidic bite), Balta (42%), Creashaun (36%)
Mar 3, 2011 |Lv 51|The Redhorn Mountains|Kjaz vs 3: Nathuel (73%), Pago (25%, sting), Poerlouge (1%)
Mar 4, 2011 |Lv 51|Feanwyyn Weald|Hyu vs 2: Poerlouge (41%), Kjaz (58%, torments)
Mar 4, 2011 |Lv 51|The Ruins of Ostalagiah|Mexzi vs 5: Hyu (0%), Aelozzosot (67%), Mundin (3%), Poerlouge (29%, immolation), Kjaz (0%)