Description
You see a sleek, feline woman, covered from head to toe in shadow: not
only are her long, wild hair and fur a smooth, coal-like hue and her
skin a dark grayish tone, but darkness and lack of vibrancy seem to be
the motif of most of her clothing as well. The most obvious pieces of
her apparel is a long, gray coat, almost like a robe, that hangs
loosely over the rest of her gear, and a gleaming collar of bronze
that sits snugly around her neck, with no apparent way of removing it.
Something appears to be carved on it, but it's too small and blurry to
make out what it is without getting very close; however, symbols of
similar overall shape have been literally branded on the bare skin of
her inner ear, which look like "3XIA".
Her posture lacks the usual grace one might expect of a felar as she
stands slightly hunched forward. Her voice also bears a hoarse tone,
but neither of these seem the result of advanced age as her appearance
is otherwise youthful.
What really stands out among all the blacks and grays, though, are her
eyes. They are a fiery orange and entirely solid in this color, with
no apparent pupils or whites to be seen, shimmering with a subtle
inner glow. Nothing suggests a lack of vision, though, with her eerie
gaze following things of interest in her vicinity without trouble.
Role
A new lead
Added Sun Aug 31 01:29:52 2008 at level 37:
There still was no resolution, no profound revelation about what made
her tick, so to speak. She had met some people whose words had given
her own thoughts some validation, but they were not comparable to
hearing the Truth from the only source she would trust. Maybe the Dark
Baron was just testing her, seeing if the uncertainty would break her
again. But no, she was not going to give up now, not after coming this
far.
Another possibility had emerged... or rather, it had always been there
but not until recently had she given it consideration. There were the
Scions. They weren't the kind of people to back away from truths, even
if the truths weren't the most pleasant ones... they sought insight
into things many wouldn't even want to hear about. Of course her own
problems wouldn't be of any particular interest for them, but there was
the chance of finding out more about herself through their lore. The
hard part was just convincing them to share said lore, of course, but
an initial discussion with one of them sounded promising, enough so to
convince her to pursue the matter further.
All in all, things looked fairly up for a change. She was not entirely
on her own in her search, and there were people who refused to buy into
the lies of the gods of the so called Light... people who thought on
their own and accepted their nature instead of cowering away from it
behind false labels of "righteousness" and "good". There would be no
cause for despair for her, today.
A side note on that weird lastname!
Added Thu Aug 14 12:25:39 2008 at level 34:
I know it's silly, but it's not so much a last name but a second one.
Besides it does make sense! Right?
Soul-searching
Added Tue Aug 12 15:05:29 2008 at level 33:
There had been little progress with the literal soul-searching, but on
the bright side, she had had a lot of time to mull over the different
possibilities.
Though there was something depressing about the possibility that she
was just a particularly clever flesh golem, a miserable little pile of
urges and thoughts with no "substance" behind them, so to speak, it
also had some benefits. If and when she died, she'd dissipate into
nothingness. There would be no repercussions for anything she she'd
have done with her life, no way for retribution against her sins. No
damnation for not playing along the irritating games of the gods of
Light. Of course she hadn't been letting that get in the way of her
before, but it was an... added incentive. All the threats of the Maran
about her soul being tainted? Completely baseless and even more
laughable.
And there was the flipside... there would be no real fulfillment, no
future. In a way she'd be just like a dream, that's gone forever once
the dreamer wakes. Whereas everyone else would find continuation in
one form or another, there was only oblivion for her. It was hard to
pinpoint why, exactly, this evanescence of existence felt threatening
despite how it would allow her even more freedom. Maybe because it
confirmed that she was just a thing, a number.
No, if she had the choice, she'd much rather be a real person, with a
soul to back the mind. A soul to nourish until it'd rise above the
lesser ones and be more than a pawn built for a purpose, no matter the
price of failure being possibly more than just her life... but her
eternity.
There'd be no one more qualified to solve this dilemma than the gods
themselves, or even more precisely one particular one with much
rumored interest over the matters of souls and their paths through the
world. All she'd need is to convince this god to share the knowledge
with her... which no doubt would come with a price, but that she was
prepared to face. After all, if she was just an automaton, she had
nothing in particular to fear - outside ceasing to exist prematurely.
And if she was not... her soul without doubt would fall into his
clutches in any case... to the domain of the Dark Lord Beroxxus.
What makes a person?
Added Sun Aug 3 08:41:21 2008 at level 29:
She shouldn't have ever read that damn book. Khardrath's Theories of
Conjuration, to be exact. While she had been rampaging through the
warehouse, she had come upon it and paged through, not giving much
thought to what was written inside, but something in those pages was
stuck on her mind like an itch she couldn't reach.
Of course most of what it said was theories and daydreams, but there
was mention of a "soular theory" and that beings of extraplanar origin
were lacking of... a soul, and that drew them to this plane of
existence, to find completion and fulfillment for their existence. And
there of course was no doubt that golems and other magical automatons
had no soul.
What if she didn't either?
Maybe her consciousness was just a collection of thoughts held
together with the glue of magic, on top of a soulless body equally
crafted with magic. Maybe there really was no "Xia". She tried to
dismiss the thought, but it kept sneaking back to her mind, especially
when some hypocrite started preaching to her about the "taint on her
soul". As if they were so pure as they pretended to be, either... but
they at least did have a soul...
No, there had to be *some* way to solve this. This was something she'd
have to find certainty of, or it'd drive her mad... or worse, back
into aimless despair.
A look at Xia
Added Fri Aug 1 11:53:16 2008 at level 12:
Xia is an experiment. His Master, a wicked, ruthless dark-elf mage,
was seeking to achieve greatness on scale of the biomancers of legend,
forging life into a new shape. A shape that would serve his nefarious
purposes. He gathered strong slaves of a variety of races, forcing
them to breed, and worked his magic to infuse the pregnant with vile
potions and other spells. He corrupted the blood of the mothers and
the unborn children with that of beasts, monsters and demons, simply
hoping to get lucky and generate what he wanted: a being of fierce
power, viciousness and obedience.
Most of the subjects died. Those who survived would serve as parentage
for the next batch. Xia is from the third batch, her blood a muddled
mixture that is mostly felar. She grew up at fierce speed, at the age
of 4 reaching maturity both physically and mentally. However, the
Master deemed her too independent, too likely to lose control and
rebel against his demands. She was to die, but he had not expected her
ability to understand her position: she escaped into the wild.
For over ten years she survived on her own, with barely any contact
with civilization. Her mind was as shattered as her blood, but slowly
she constructed something cohesive out of the pieces. She would not
succumb to despair at being a monster and a failed experiment, she
would cherish her tainted blood... she would find her own success.
Eventually she brought herself out of seclusion, finding her way into
the guild of shapeshifters - what better way would there be to unleash
the shadow of the beast within her and build upon the magic so infused
to her very being?
As far as her personality goes... she can be hateful, cruel, take
delight in inflicting pain upon others, but a part of her still yearns
for acceptance and love. She is aware of it, and would probably
respond with even more anger and disdain should someone try to appeal
to it. The conflict can make her somewhat unstable at times and prone
to bouts of violence.
The Escape
Added Fri Aug 1 11:52:42 2008 at level 12:
A failure... Master said she was a failure, unsuccessful, to be put
down. An experiment with no future. Just a number. A monster, broken,
incomplete, without a name.
She stared at her reflection in the water. She was so alone, with no
purpose. Master had a purpose for her, but she was not good enough.
Damn the Master. No! The failure was his, he is the one who made a
mistake, he is who lacked insight and ambition and patience!
Tears streaking down her cheeks, she laughed in a hollow tone, the
voice echoing between the trees of the forest. She so loved Master,
she had wanted to be the one to fill his demands... no, no, he was a
fool, a betrayer, no less a monster than her!
She turned back to stare into the shadows of the forest, the way where
she had come, or at least thought she had come. Somewhere there, was
the Master's laboratory. Where she had been given life. Master... she
wanted to go back, to beg for another chance, offer him anything...
rip his throat out, feast on his entrails, paint the walls red with
his blood.
Her emotions ran mixed and without control, offering her no guidance.
Luckily, her wits were not overcome. If she returned, she would be
killed without question. She would not find revenge nor acceptance.
She turned her gaze back to her reflection, the blank orange eyes
staring right back from the rippling surface.
I am more than a number, more than an experiment that happened not to
go according the plan. His failure will not be mine. I am... who am I?
Something in the reflection... she lifted a paw, touching the claws to
her ear. Her number, branded into her flesh forever... Three-XIA.
Third batch of the experiment, sixth specimen, firstborn of the two
number 6 specimens. (Editor's note: XI is not the Roman numeral 11,
it's 6.)
Xia.
I am Xia.
PK Wins
Aug 1, 2008 |Lv 15|Voralian City|Sfetwylur vs 3: Fiedel (49%), Craws (45%, KB), Xia (4%)
Aug 10, 2008|Lv 33|The Pass|Neriyin vs 1: Xia (100%,KB)
Aug 14, 2008|Lv 34|Hamsah Mu'tazz|Vengrogh vs 1: Xia (100%,KB)