Description
Barely five feet tall, this woman is very peculiar looking. Her thin torso is
covered with taut, ropey muscle, but her legs bulge like knotted tree trunks,
the musculature seeming to nearly burst through the skin. The result is an
appearance which makes her look awkward at best, and unbalanced at worst. Yet
when she moves, you see she is simply adapted to climbing, clinging, and
crawling at great speeds. Under an eclectic mass of garments, her ashen skin
is the color of weathered slate, with deep lines creasing its surface, a
testament to her middle age. Her features, though, are bright and vibrant,
and her violet eyes sparkle in the light. Strapped to her right hip by a
crude harness is an old clay pipe. It has obviously seen a lot of use, as its
coloring has faded and it is chipped in one place. Currently, it seems to be
filled with swamp weed, individual hairs nearly resonating with a purplish
hue.
Role
A Difficult Decision
Added Wed Feb 7 17:20:37 2007 at level 51:
After much consideration, seeing little of Faythan, and even less
of his contributions, I decided to uninduct him. This decision came
from a general sense that this mage just didn't care. He had to be
encouraged to do everything, from writing a missive to introduce
himself, to speaking with respect to myself or others, or to
even hold an event.
When I gave him a chance and asked if he'd be around to speak
about something important, he simply said that would be difficult
to tell. I came back and spoke with him, explaining my reasons, and removed
him from the Heralds. He didn't take this well. In fact, he
began spewing venomous words such as 'authoritarian' and 'taskmaster'
saying "how can I be a Herald when a woman rides me all the time,
caring only about her stupid events and flowery poetry?"
I tried to have a civil discussion with him, resisting any urge
to get defensive or attack in turn, and was for the most part,
successful. Unfortunately, he does not understand and thinks it a
matter of my opinion versus his. He reinforced my decision
by saying that he didn't care because I was an idiot. Lack of caring,
lack of commitment, are two terrible qualities for a Herald.
I told him I am not a hard, woman, but that is not exactly
true. I have survived things and explored the depths of myself
deeper than he can imagine, and this was my decision. I will
not tolerate a lack of respect, caring, and commitment within
the family of Heralds, and for this, he was removed.
Scribed in an elegant, careful hand on a scroll found in Zaphoedine's bag
Lord Sebeok
Added Sat Feb 3 16:15:31 2007 at level 51:
It has come to my attention, through varied whisperings, that
Lord Sebeok has returned to the Theran ground, to slumber and dream.
This saddens me, as I had hoped he would be my mentor, my guide
but I am happy, in that I imagine he finds revelation even in sleep,
His eye gazing about the lands, tirelessly.
I do not wish to desecrate his memory by finding another.
Rather, I shall find my own path.
Zaphoedine Le'Tourdain
Time Passes
Added Sat Feb 3 08:01:37 2007 at level 51:
An excerpt from the Blingdenstone Crier:
"Strangely, this human woman keeps trying to creep about our nicely hewn
caverns. She has caused no harm, but we are not sure of her intent, so be
wary."
A scroll found in a small pouch strapped to Zaphoedine's back:
"Time has passed. I grow older, lines creasing my face. Lord Sebeok has not
answered me, to help me in my quest to gain more enlightenment of self.
Perhaps he thinks I have shirked my wild roots and cling only to the
civilization of the Inn. No, that is unfair. He sees all and knows I do not.
More effort is needed.
On another note, Lady Iunna allowed me to become the High Herald, for which I
felt honored. I have tried to recruit only quality individuals, ones who
would makes wonderful Heralds, rather than attempting to amass a large cadre
of those who have no merit. I think I have done well so far. I am
disappointed, however, by event attendance. Only by scribing a Heraldic
missive was I able to gather individuals for Neikarin's gambling night. None
have responded to my food recipe idea.
*There is a doodle here, of a man being stabbed in the throat.*
I am doing my best, exploring, learning, trying to chronicle the events and
persons of Thera in great detail. I only hope I can live up to Lady Iunna's
expectations. And yet, with Lord Sebeok's silence, I feel...an absence within
myself, despite all my efforts.
Perhaps I become bitter. I have noticed that I have started drinking too much
milk and bourbon lately. Getting a bit irritated, I even shouted at the
Empress of Thera after a friend's death. Not that I hold any regard for her,
but for the betterment of the Heralds, in that I can continue to scribe and
learn, producing the histories of Thera without bringing vengeance upon us
all, this was an irrational and foolish move.
All I seek is to find myself, my true, deepest self, and within that
manifestation, learn and scribe all I can. Stay strong, Zaphie, and read this
to bolster yourself."
Zaphoedine
A Finale of Sorts
Added Sat Jan 6 14:38:17 2007 at level 51:
Having not seen Balim for a while, and believing that Camilla was indeed a
W'Raithe who had been severed only by our continued bond, I was not at all
surprised to find Camilla standing by my side one day. Smiling, Camilla
seemed in a good mood, and I felt joy for the first time in weeks. Despite my
friends' findings, I had always taken comfort in Camilla's presence, and it
was wonderful to see her again.
As I soon found out, however, everything was not as it seemed. Balim appeared
shortly thereafter, coughing and weak beyond belief. He believed Camilla was
harming him, and I carried him to the open plains, where he would presumably
speak the ancient words and strengthen the bond between us, lessening his
pain.
This plan did not work. For Camilla was never a W'Raithe, but another
personality of mine, created to take the blunt of the trauma I had suffered
in the attic. Due to my endless quest for revelation of self, she evolved
from that point into a personality who took on all bad events. Exploring
oneself to such a depth can reveal horrors unimaginable, and Camilla's
perpetual presence was a testament to this fact. At times, when she believed
I was in danger, she even took over my mind. Balim's W'Raithe language had
indeed drawn out and subdued Camilla, but not in the way we had previously
thought.
The language had simply caused Camilla to realize she was in danger of being
expelled, not through magic, but through my understanding of what she truly
was. And so when taking over my mind did not work, she faded for a time, to
allow me to sink back into a fog of ignorance. This plan also backfired, as
in helping Balim realize his W'Raithe was the one to blame, I realized what
Camilla really was.
I now have a clear mind without sadness, for while Camilla is gone, I am
whole. I must tell Lord Sebeok of my findings.
Insanity
Added Tue Dec 26 02:05:25 2006 at level 44:
A hastily scrawled note, penned with an embossed silver writing instrument
can be found in Zaphoedine's pack.
"Killed Daddy, and Camilla's real! Well, thought she was. I can see her, but
no one else can. Either I am crazy, or the rest of the world is. Subjective
reality, as I've always said. Met an interesting bard, though, name of Balim.
Claims Camilla is a...what was it? W'raithe, I think. Said she was my mirror.
Interesting, as it leaves a third possibility not involving insanity. Will
have to explore more of this. Headaches getting worse. Sometimes I black out,
can't remember, and wake to old friends patting my shoulder. Strange."
Revelation
Added Fri Dec 1 20:18:31 2006 at level 40:
The attic looked the same as Zaphoedine remembered, if dustier. A family of
rodents had taken to nesting in the corner as well. She knew every inch of
the attic, her old "home," and yet had never noticed the strange shape in its
middle, right as one entered, draped with a drab white sheet.
Pulling it off, Zaphoedine found a very plain mirror, its cheap wood inset
with a perfectly polished face. Strangely, as Zaphoedine looked into it, she
felt herself falling, something splitting and tearing within her mind, a
release or even catharsis, though not the one for which she had always
searched.
For as her head cleared, she saw within the mirror Camilla standing beside
her. Mouth agape, she glanced to her side and there she stood. Not
imagination, but real? Shock was replaced by the joy of reunion and they
hugged. And then came the voice, the same muffled voice she'd heard years
before.
"Zaphoedine? It's father! Why are you up there? Come down and greet me, I
have much to tell you."
Zaphoedine opened the door and peered down. Sure enough, her father stood
there. She walked as in a daze down the steps.
"Dearest, you got my letter then. I was afraid it would not find you. I am so
sorry for the past, so sorry for the deception and the horrors I brought upon
you. Come, embrace your father."
She approached him, but not for an embrace. As they neared, she drew a dagger
and plunged it into his throat, arterial spray spattering her face as she
drew the blade out. Grabbing his throat, father staggered, grabbing
Zaphoedine in supplication. Zaphoedine plunged the dagger into her father's
side and twisted.
"Here, daddy, I brought you a gift." Camilla giggled beside her.
Time passed, though how long is indeterminate. Arriving back at the Inn,
Zaphoedine found everyone had aged, her old love Tiatan elderly. Yet they
reunited immediately and even made love. She told him, and Meora, everything.
Strangely, they were unable to see Camilla. Shortly thereafter, Olin said,
"This came for you while you were gone, lass. Here." And gave her this
letter:
"Dearest, forgive me. After all these years, I have returned. Please come."
No signature.
Revelation
Added Sun Nov 5 22:38:20 2006 at level 40:
Zaphoedine attended the Halloween festivities and had great fun setting of
elf fountains and listening to stories. She even told her own, though it
sounded absolutely ludicrous.
She even jumped Tiatan, a creature she felt love for, and yet knew not how to
express it. Alone for so long, when she finally found another she cared
about, she simply let her feelings carry her. Those feelings, at the time,
were lust. He pushed her away, yet obviously cares deeply for her. She had a
talk with him, and days later, a long talk with he and Meora, telling stories
of their past and hopeful futures. While she cares for him, Zaphoedine is
beginning to feel scared, encroached. He waits for her everywhere, wished to
speak about love and motivations and his history of deception. While she
loves him in her own way, she also feels...almost burdened. Perhaps she came
on too strong at first, and this is what has happened.
She made him promise never to strike those of the Light, though he is not of
the Light. He even joined the Heralds, and she suspects he did this simply
for her. What to do about Tiatan, she is not sure.
Recently, she returned to her father's mansion. A call of sorts sent her
there, and she entered the old house, unused now for at least a decade.
Sheets covered the furniture, protecting it from the dust, but creatures had
taken root, particularly in the attic. Yes, she steeled herself and crept
once more into her former prison, intent on finding answers within, and
within herself.
For as she has sought revelation within herself all these years, even Tiatan
and the Heralds have so far unknowlingly been unable to aid her enough to
uncover them within herself. But perhaps the attic was just the catharsis she
needed.
Another perspective.
Added Wed Oct 25 21:20:04 2006 at level 38:
As Olar tried to tell me, some perspectives are just wrong.
Iunna helped me adjust mine, and I see my error in thinking.
I wasn't properly considering how my actions were affecting
others, is what I've come to realize.
PERSPECTIVE!
Added Tue Oct 24 23:20:29 2006 at level 38:
As I told Olar long ago, perspective is all that matters. Here's a nice
example. I'm made a criminal through perspective. I think my good friend is
dead, found her gravestone even. Thought I did. Now, what happens?
Tjijilaena is NOT dead, Olin wants to kill me, and that's that. And who says
perspective doesn't matter? I can't reason with either of them. Olin tries to
strike me dead and yet all I do is serve the Inn. Tjijilaena wants to cease
the 'joyous reunion' and get to business. Who's to say who's right?
Perspective. Subjective reality.
Perspective rules the world, without rules ironically. A Herald, having to
kill or be killed by her barman. A Herald who only tried to help the
Fortress.
What kind of world is that? A world of perspective, my dears. A world of
perspective.
Learning from Mistakes
Added Sun Oct 22 02:27:09 2006 at level 37:
Had her first fight today trying to aid the Fortress. Messed it up horribly
and died. Felt like a complete idiot. To make matters worse, she was summoned
after being sent to the Temple and dirt kicked the attacker, causing her to
be made a criminal. She admitted her guilt, naively, and was made a criminal.
Bloody funny, really, looking like an idiot.
Besides learning a few things about tactics, Zaphoedine feels like she's
dealing with her mistakes well. She feels foolish, but she can handle it, and
will go on.
A New Beginning
Added Sat Oct 21 19:22:21 2006 at level 37:
Eacer's death weighs heavily on Zaphoedine. He was the one who made her a
part of the Heralds, and was a wonderful creature, always ready with a tasty
meal or an insightful word. Yet she continues on, exploring the realms,
trying to map out the unknown and practice her penmanship. Writing notes
pleases her greatly, and she aspires to become a master scribe. If only she
could find a better bloody pen.
She has finally assented to take her father's name, Le'Tourdain, though she
despises him and all that he did to her. Regardless of his vicious actions
and poor fatherly abilities, the name pleases her, and represents what she
remembers of her mother, strangely enough.
As she becomes older, the need for others to like her has decreased, and her
paranoia that she drives everyone away has all but dissipated.
A Bitter Struggle
Added Mon Oct 9 00:03:39 2006 at level 25:
Zaphoedine experienced many things now:
She was inducted into the Inn, a place she felt at home, meeting friends such
as Meora and Eacer, who treated her like family. Things have been strange,
what with the magic becoming chaotic and some Consortium running about
digging things up they really shouldn't.
She's been piecing these things together, learning the rumors and talk from
the Inn and others.
Still, she feels that she drives everyone away. Her groups that she finds
leave her, or disband before she can get there due to circumstance. People
she talks to walk away. Quests, like for the Horn of Fate, which she
overheard at the Inn, exist. Hidden ones say to follow, and yet leave before
she has a chance. Her old friend Enquarwahien is always with others, too
accomplished in his guild to travel with her.
And her friend Meora is infected with the gods only know what, a painful
affliction that seems to have no pleasant end in sight. Without question,
Zaphoedine would help shoulder some of her friend's pain, as she knows of no
solution, but Meora refuses.
Zaphoedine finds that she is insecure, wanting others' company and attention
more than ever, often feeling that the time spend in that attic has cursed
her to a life of no contact with others. She feels embittered, yet hopes to
prevail.
A Flame
Added Wed Oct 4 22:42:30 2006 at level 20:
What a good soul Chagos is. Firm, strong, piercing eyes. Able in combat, and
can turn into a skunk. What more would a girl want? Hrm. Could even smoke my
pipe and be somewhat rational, though no doubt he left quickly. The spirits
reveal what it is one wants, and such desire is often outrageous or uncouth.
Good work though, as he smoked it and wanted me. Loving creature, I like so
much to pet his fur as a skunk. I hope the elf doesn't get jealous.
An Interesting Turn of Events
Added Wed Oct 4 20:07:05 2006 at level 19:
Time passed, as time tends to do, or at least as we perceive it to. At her
15th rank, Zaphoedine met a nice young elf, who she began traveling with.
After a hard day's learning, as well as some fighting with more dark-minded
individuals, they both retired to a place well-named, The Inn of the Eternal
Star.
Sitting about, conversing, watching others make drinks, joke, and tell
stories, Zaphoedine realized that she wanted to be able to do those things.
She'd always wanted to be good at interacting with others, and hadn't she
gotten better at speaking and relating to others during the course of her
long travels? If she were ever to become truly involved in the outside world
again, wouldn't this be the place to work?
As all these thoughts coursed through her head, she was offered drinks, which
she took gladly. Unfortunately, after one drink she staggered about, yelling
inane things about her past and fell to the floor in a stupor. Aroused a
while later, she did manage to ask about a job and even had a word with
Eacer. He had told her to get a bit older and then apply.
How embarrassed she was, yet should she be? She had seen her father drink,
but she'd never touched a drop, much less downed it in a gulp. Perhaps
falling face first onto the floor happened to everyone the first time. And
she had grown older since then, nearly the 20th rank, and had only had one
other incident with alcohol.
As she embraced her skills, she also embraced the possibility of soon working
at the Inn. There she would meet people from all walks of life, and they
would all share their adventures in story, song, and, if she could handle it,
drink.
Escape to the Outdoors
Added Fri Sep 29 18:34:32 2006 at level 10:
Did I get that right, Bludg?
he attic became as a cave to
Zaphoedine. She knews all its passages, winding their way through ten foot
stacks of books and boxes into hidden recesses and dead ends. She knew where
the peekholes were, places she could peer down into the mansion, observing
the servants at their work and the inevitable arguments between father and
mother. The food had stopped coming, and so she also knew how to catch rats
and eat them. Their bony carcasses were repulsive to her, and did little to
improve her now sickly thin form. Zaphoedine kept sane by speaking with
Camilla, but also by going deep within her own thoughts. She didn't mind
isolation, really, and enjoyed being an unnoticed observer. Still, she longed
to speak with others who could really answer, as she was always aware Camilla
was but a creation of her mind.
One day the attic door opened, quite unexpectedly, and there stood her
mother, flushed and excited. Her father had been found dead, his corpse
rotting in some gambling den, probably the victim of a dispute. The house had
been left to her mother, and so she had immediately released her. At first,
Zaphoedine was loathe to leave the close confines she so valued, but she
eventually relented. A quick succession of events followed.
- Zaphoedine was unhappy with the mansion and her whereabouts.
- She resisted all attempts by her mother at formal acculturation, and longed
for new experiences, new creatures to meet and speak with.
- She left the house and ventured forth, finding she loved the outdoors. So
expansive, and yet able to confine if one wished.
- She tried talking with others, but found she was not very adept, often
making jokes others didn't understand or think funny.
- She began to isolate herself, living in caves that resembled her old attic.
Despite a certain resentment from that place, she felt most comfortable in
this terrain, for there was no fear of rejection.
And so the years passed, and Zaphoedine became stronger and faster, her legs
powerful from clinging from precipices, her instincts sharper than ever
before, her comfort with the dark, damp places of the earth indisputable. And
yet still she longed for the contact of other creatures, and hoped to find
it, and be accepted, in good time. Until then, she would survive the best she
could and the only way she knew how.
A Musty Perspective
Added Wed Sep 27 02:10:39 2006 at level 10:
The attic stretched for what seemed like miles. Unbroken, it covered the
whole of the mansion's top floor, its tiny windows letting in only the barest
of light. For time ungaugeable or even imaginable save for the setting of the
sun, Zaphoedine huddled in the recess in which she was placed. Never was the
door unlocked, yet she heard her mother's knocking each night, whispering in
the stillness that she loved her and that she must be strong.
There was no escape. Her mother did not possess the key and her father would
not allow her release. He came at first, banging on the attic door and
screaming about stations and wealth and other things, but Zaphoedine just
scampered away, concealing herself further and further into the attic's
depths. Soon her father's voice seemed a dream, and she wasn't sure it even
existed. She and Camilla had, by this time, explored much of the attic,
finding ancient, broken playthings to amuse them. Her senses became more
acute, her fear suppressed or melted into near oblivion. Had she not had the
benefit of her mother's nightly whisperings, Zaphoedine may have lapsed into
darkness forever.
But she did have them, and they sustained her, allowing her to believe there
was goodness and love in the world. As she aged, Zaphoedine came to realize
that she had simply been dealt a particularly poor hand in life.
But hands reap rewards based on how you play them, and she soon found this out.
Personality disorder or Supernatural Force?
Added Sun Dec 31 00:53:12 2006 at level 49:
A young bard sits in his guild penning the following for his records:
Camilla is no more. At first an imaginary friend who kept Zaphoedine company
in the attic in which she was locked, and then a real sister who kept her
safe in her travels (not that this bard or any others could see her),
providing cryptic information and questionable insight, Camilla has seemingly
disappeared.
Balim, Tsyda, and Tiatan, all trusted friends of the ranger in question,
insisted that Camilla was taking control of Zaphoedine. Whether or not this
was true is unknown, but Zaphoedine did admit to suffering increasingly
severe headaches and blackouts, after which she was unable to account for the
time which had passed. Putting faith in her friends, she allowed Balim to
utter ancient words in the W'Raithe language, meant to seize control of
Camilla and drive her out.
Based on testimony from her three friends, Camilla took over and attacked
them, but after much struggle, Zaphoedine was subdued and Camilla was split
in two. Her mind now resides in Zaphoedine and her voice has taken root in
Balim, effectively destroying the so-called W'Raithe. Per Balim's words, he
and Zaphoedine now share an uncommonly strong bond, so strong he is
considering leaving Nexus. Zaphoedine was heard to say, "My head is clearer,
but I miss her."
The Attic
Added Wed Sep 27 01:50:45 2006 at level 10:
Zaphoedine was born and raised, if you could call it that, in a large,
austere mansion maintained by more than twenty servants. The rooms were
lavish cubes, filled with expensive dressers and busts and carpets that no
one ever touched, admired, walked upon, or even took notice of. Her father
was the Duke of something or other, and was often away shmoozing at
fashionable gatherings with her mother in tow. After all, as he often
boasted, wagging his thin finger at Zaphoedine and frowning disapprovingly,
"A happy family and a loving wife does wonders to improve one's station."
Yet they were anything but a happy family. She was never asked on these
excursions, and in fact her father paid her little mind, except for telling
her to straighten up or act like a lady, or cursing her under his breath
claiming she couldn't be his child. Zaphoedine's mother was nearly three
decades younger than her father, the marriage a result of a greedy Viscount
and her father's need for a dowry after his terrible gambling habits had
nearly bankrupted his fortune.
As a result, Zaphoedine was often left alone, without siblings or playmates
for amusement. The kitchen staff was no fun, and so she created an imaginary
friend named Camilla. She and Camilla roamed the great rooms of the mansion,
never straying to the forbidden cellar or attic, until one day her father
returned in a particularly irritable mood to find she had broken a small clay
pipe he had imported from a faraway land. Not that he had ever smoked, or
even held the pipe in great regard. It was yet another piece he used to show
his wealth when entertaining. And yet her father was furious and banished her
to the attic.
"You may come down when you learn obedience, young woman!" he shouted,
casting her into the attic and locking the door to the protests of her
mother.
Terrified not only at her father's wrath, but the large, musty gloom of the
attic, Zaphoedine huddled in the corner, with only Camilla to keep her
company.